titles; let's make use of them

I'm feeling oddly optimistic about life. This feel is odder when you realize that it hasn't been even five minutes since the last time I purged. Purging and I have an odd relationship. I don't constantly have the feel to purge after I eat, even if I eat large amount. It just sort of comes at me randomly. Like 6 minutes ago, when I ate some pita chips and red pepper humus and decided that it would be a good idea to get rid of it all.

Despite that, I seem to have purged bad feelings away as well.

I don't know. Let me be weird today.

So there we go. I'm against purging constantly but I'm not against doing it once in a while. Like many people around these parts, I'm a fan of restricting so that's what I'm going to do. I'm not going to give myself binge and/or purge days because that leads to failure. I'm going to do my best to avoid it. I really do work best doing things at the spur of the moment so I feel good.

Also, I finished reading Wintergirls and the main character had a rule somewhere in the middle of the book where she gave herself a set number of calories per day but had her days start at dinner. I read that and almost gasped. It seemed brilliant, despite the depressing nature of the book. I must be really messed up if I'm willing to take advice from a rather destructive character.

By the way, I highly recommend Wintergirls. It was a brilliant novel that I found in the teen section of Barnes and Noble.

And now, my goals for the rest of the year:

- 09/18 - Beach trip; -4 lbs 143

- 09/19 - Wedding; -1 lbs 142

- 10/02 - Baby Shower; -1 lb

- 10/15-17 - School trip; -4 lbs

- 10/31 - Halloween; -4 lbs

So I guess I want to lose 14 pounds by Halloween? Nice. Max 500-800 cals per day. Up to 1000 cals on Saturdays OR Sundays. Plan accordingly.

Now I have to fit in work out times, homework times, Japanese study times, class times and I'll be set.

Wish me luck and good luck to you guys!

[EDIT: I'll edit in weights randomly as I go...]